


Cheiloproclitic

by akadiene



Series: the feeling lost and found you again [3]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Asexuality Spectrum, Autism Spectrum, Autistic Jack, F/M, Kissing, M/M, Stimming, probably
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-03
Updated: 2016-07-03
Packaged: 2018-07-19 20:33:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7376419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akadiene/pseuds/akadiene
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cheiloproclitic - Being attracted to someones lips.</p><p>Jack really likes kissing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cheiloproclitic

Jack likes kissing.

More specifically: lips, soft soft soft lips, sweet-sugar lip gloss (not too sticky), rough stubble on stubble, warm mouth, hot saliva, teeth nipping (not too hard), tongues together, soft puffs of breath, little squeaks, noses touching.

Yeah, Jack likes kissing a lot. He’s learned to hold himself back because not everyone understands -- it’s not a romantic thing, it’s a sensory thing, and his psychiatrist had said something about a spectrum, and when he’d told Shitty about it Shitty had asked  _which spectrum?_ and Jack had shrugged because it didn’t really matter if it got the same results. 

And the kissing is one thing -- a favourite thing -- but it’s not the only thing: heavy hands, sitting in his lap, laying on his chest, head on his shoulder, skin against skin. He likes that, but not necessarily the rest, so sometimes he can’t get the kissing and the little bit after, and anyway, he can’t be going around kissing just anyone no campus because news would get around faster than a Bitty lap around the rink.

So mostly he sticks to kissing Lardo and Ransom (not Holster -- he’s too big) and Camilla when she wants and Shitty when he’s feeling a bit lost and floating in the wind.  
  
(”Bro, I’ll shave it off for you.”

“Shits, no. Don’t do that.”

“I just want to make you feel good.”

“It’s not like we’re dating or anything. I know this isn’t _normal,_ you don’t have to indulge me.”

“You’re saying that like it’s a real fucking chore to make out with Samwell’s democratically-elected Number One Prettiest fucking Human. But fine, I won’t. I don’t give a shit what’s normal though, so just say the word. Want me to sit on your lap now?”

“...Yeah. Thanks.”

“Don’t even fucking mention it, you goddamn beautiful specimen.”)

It’s easy with them -- they don’t expect more, they don’t even want more, they understand it. It helps still his brain when he gets too locked up in his own mind, when the plays are running over and over in his head, looping through every possible scenario, thinking of everything that could go wrong and what would lead them to make it go right. He doesn’t do it in front of the frogs and wouldn’t ask them to help anyway because they’re so young, and he’s gotten better at controlling the urges now, but sometimes he kind of forgets that it’s not really a thing most people do. So when he picks up Lardo and sets her on the kitchen counter at two in the afternoon on a Wednesday, she knows exactly what he wants and gives him a little fond smile before leaning in to kiss him. His brain stops whirring and he focuses on the feel of it -- small waist against his palm, her hands pressing down on his shoulders like she knows he likes, lips lips lips lips, and--

“Oh, Lord. I’ll uh, just, oh, God. I’ll go.” 

Jack stumbles away from Lardo and opens his eyes too quickly -- the sunlight floods his vision and when it clears he sees Bitty standing in the doorway gaping at them.

“No, it’s alright, I’ve got to get to class anyway,” Lardo says, patting Jack on the chest before hopping down and making her way out with a hum.

“I, uh, didn’t know you two were...” Bitty starts, but the words fade, and he keeps stepping from one foot to the other, and he’s not looking at Jack but at the floor then above his shoulder then out the window then back to the floor.

“We’re not. It’s just, uh, it helps sometimes.”

Bitty furrows his brow and bites his lip (lips lips lips) and just stands there bathed in the afternoon sun. Jack is almost surprised no one’s ever mentioned his _thing_ before, especially to Bitty, who’s been around for a year now, and who has integrated himself into Jack’s little family so snugly it’s like he’s always been there. And that’s another reason he only ever kisses Lardo and Ransom and Camilla and Shitty: with them, there’s never any danger of wanting more.

“Helps?” Bitty finally repeats. He’s looking a bit like Jack feels.

“It calms me down when I’m anxious. It’s not -- it’s not romantic, or sexual, or anything like that,” Jack says, then, because he’s afraid Bitty will get the wrong idea, “not with them anyway.”

“Them?”

“Oh.” Shit, yeah, he’s gone too far in his head again. “Lardo, and, uh Shitty sometimes, and Camilla from the tennis team, and Ransom.”

He can practically hear the questions whirling around in Bitty’s mind, and Jack feels his breathing pick up, what if Bitty thinks it’s strange, what if he won’t want to talk to Jack anymore, or what if he tells Deadspin, or what if--

“It helps? A bit like... a hug?”

Jack startles and opens his eyes -- he hadn’t even realized he’d closed them, and Bitty’s lips are blossoming red but his shoulders aren’t as tight and square, and God. Yup. There’s the reason. 

“Yeah. And I like those too. Look, Bittle, I know it’s not common, just kissing your friends like that, but could you, just, not tell anyone? Outside the Haus?”

“Jack! I would never! I’m just... surprised, that’s all. That you didn’t tell me before.”

“Oh. I’m sorry?”

“No, Lord, don’t be sorry! It’s just... Couldn’t _I_ help?” Bitty’s taken a step forward and is _staring at Jack’s lips_  which is something that doesn’t usually happen because it’s always the other way around.

“Bittle... I... Not with you,” Jack whispers and Bitty stops, his goddamn expressive face clearly showing _hurt_ like a punch to the gut.

“Oh. Okay. Just, I’ll go now,” he says and turns to go, but Jack has to say something, anything, so he grabs Bitty’s arm and squeezes. Bitty stops, and looks at Jack.

“It’s just...” God, the words are stuck in his throat and lungs and mind but they can’t make it to his mouth and all he wants is _Bitty’s_ mouth, lips, skin, weight on him. “If I start with you, I’ll never want to stop.”

“Oh.” Bitty looks up, and before, where it was _hurt_ painted across his features like modern art, now it’s something like _hope_. “You’re saying it wouldn’t be like the others.”

“Yeah,” Jack breathes out. Steps closer like the masochistic fool he is, and Bitty’s right there with him because he does too, and there so close Jack can see the lines in his lips and the freckles on his nose.

“Well, I don’t think I’d want to stop much either,” Bitty says and that’s enough for Jack to close the last few inches and lean down to kiss him.

Hours later, after they’ve moved to Jack’s bed and Bitty is laying on Jack’s chest like he belongs there, and their lips are kiss-swollen, smiles lazy, Jack begins to panic again. And Bitty must pick up on it, because he’s got his ear close to Jack’s heartbeat, so he raises his head.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, voice soft.

“It’s just... I want this with you, but what if you’re not around when I...” Jack can’t bring himself to say _need._ He doesn’t like needing this. He likes _wanting_ it, with Bitty, because the want is new and wonderful and warm and he knows it will always be wonderful and warm even when it’s no longer new, and he hates that it won’t always be enough.

“Then you go find one of the others,” Bitty says, like it’s the simplest thing in the world. “I’ll understand.”

“You will?”

“Honey,” and Jack loves that he’s become _Honey_ so quickly, and _Sweetheart_ , and _Baby,_ “of course I will.”

Maybe it is the simplest thing in the world. He leans down to kiss Bitty again. Yeah. He's never going to want to stop.

**Author's Note:**

> Please request [a prompt and a pairing/character](http://fatlardo.tumblr.com/post/146633122556/send-me-a-word-and-a-characterpairing-and-i-will) through my tumblr ask box!
> 
> ETA, August 3rd 2016: I wrote a [bit of commentary](http://fatlardo.tumblr.com/post/148425347386/please-do-dvd-commentary-on-the-first-half-of) for the first half of this fic if anybody's interested!!
> 
> ETA, September 7th 2016: Here's a [prequel of sorts](http://fatlardo.tumblr.com/post/150091515011/jackshitty-freshmen-year-getting-together-just-as)


End file.
